Well, I mean, what more do you want? Ridley Scott’s Prometheus, which has been underwhelming audiences since last Friday, seems to be exactly what we were promised, and not much else. The problem is that we were promised both a lot, and not very much. We were and weren’t expecting a prequel to Scott’s Alien (1979), and we were and weren’t expecting a summer blockbuster with philosophical overtones. Largely, we were all expecting simply to see Prometheus because, um, the studio told us to. To which end, it’s been screening to packed out auditoriums, something like once every 20 minutes in cinemas across the country. If you’re not sure how that works, just keep an eye out for how much promotional material you can see for The Dark Knight Rises at the moment. Not too much, right? Give it a week or two. We’ll be having a similar discussion about that movie in around a month.
Regardless of why you’re seeing it (and you will) Prometheus is both one of the slickest and most exciting movies about this year, and one of the dumbest. And I don’t mean "dumb" like Air Force One. I mean bad dumb. I mean dumb, like in the first 20 minutes we get a gawky, sepia-toned flashback to Noomi Rapace’s childhood, in which she has the concept of the afterlife explained to her by her doctor daddy. Please. But I also mean exciting and slick, like sequences of genuine unease, wrenching body horror, and superior performances from almost everyone.
And I have to check, again, what more do you want? As part of the marketing blitzkrieg that’s forcing you to see this film, Ridley Scott’s reputation as a director has been pumped to busting point, his name having not-so-subtly been pushed into orbit with that of David Lean (not least with a direct quotation from Lawrence of Arabia in Prometheus). So maybe we’re expecting too much from the man who bought us Matchstick Men, Kingdom of Heaven, and A Good Year. He’s not a bad filmmaker. Alien is incredible. And Gladiator was, the last time I saw it, deeply impressive. But has he ever made you cry like Brief Encounter did? Or had you enthralled like The Bridge on the River Kwai? No. So, moving on.
Prometheus follows the crew of a spaceship named after the title of the movie, as it journeys across the stars, following patterns found in ancient cave paintings, to a distant planet on which two archaeologists and one very sinister corporation hope to find the meaning of life, the universe and everything. We’re told this in the first ten minutes, and the pop-philosophising don’t get much quieter from there.
Many have offered up the consolatory notion that, well, it’s nice to see a big Hollywood movie approach these themes. Sure it is. But it doesn’t excuse the screenwriters, Jon Spaights and Damon Lindelof, from handling them as if they were both wearing giant pointy foam "#1" gloves on each hand. And much of the exploration of the nature and origins of humanity in Prometheus boils down to people telling each other "it’s what you choose to believe". The film’s notional ambiguities tread the line between genuine mystery, and strands to be woven into a sequel and, sadly, they fall into the latter camp by the end of the movie.
All of which means that you come away from Prometheus with a slightly sour taste. There’s nothing wrong with exploring complex themes in a Hollywood movie; even pseudo-religious ones. But if you’re not going to get to a point – and especially if that’s because you’re waiting to wring some more cash out, somewhere – then there’s a problem. Ultimately, it comes down to what you choose to believe. Do you believe that Prometheus is a very solid science fiction action adventure, that keeps you watching because of tension, strong performances, great production design, and the promise of there being some Alien(s) of the traditional kind in it? Because, if so, you won’t be disappointed. You might actually end up being Appointed. But if you choose to believe in it as a genuinely thoughtful film that skilfully depicts some incredibly weighty concepts, without ever patronising its audience, and with strong, well-stated beliefs of its own, then you’re worshipping the wrong god.
